


The Hero That Kills

by StarStickerX



Category: Wandersong (Video Game)
Genre: Audery The Hero, Nightmare, Storm - Freeform, audrey - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-19
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-09-22 21:48:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17067743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarStickerX/pseuds/StarStickerX
Summary: Audrey finds herself feeling downright awful after "the end of the world," but finds no way to be able to atone for her actions.





	The Hero That Kills

**Author's Note:**

> This has 6723 words,,, and on paper (handwriting) it would be the equivalent of over 32 pages,,, this hurt lol. But I really hope you enjoy a depressed Audrey!!! :D

Audrey failed. She knew that much. She was still breathing, which meant the world hadn’t stopped spinning. Audrey, having been the hero the world needed in order to end it, should have been disappointed. She should have been crying in bed for hours after waking up in Langtree. She should have thrown a fit. She should have cursed Eya for all that she was. 

But she didn’t.

Audrey was oddly content when she heard the breeze lightly shake the trees. She was content when she could small the light scent of flowers near her face and feel grass tangle in her hair.

She sat up reluctantly, but relaxed further when a warm breeze rushed past her. Her eyes searched for a locations and found she rested in the open fields of Langtree near the edge of a wooded area. Birds decorated the branches of the tree above her, chirping loudly and happily when they realized she was okay.

“Huh.” She spoke suddenly, intrigued. The birds fluttered their wings in response, cocking their heads to the side. Audrey mimicked them with a small tilt of her head, then smiled and turned her attention back to the tall grass of the field. The birds chirped happily then flew away, Audrey watching as they disappeared into the partly cloudy blue above her. Her grin spread a little wider. When she could no longer be drawn in by them, she found better fascination in the field grass. The breeze made pleasant waves in the yellow and it stumbled over when it reached the edge of the layer of grass when there was a wooded area or a pond. Birds chirped happily, and their melodies drifted in the wind, creating a song for the trees to dance to. White streaks of clouds flew in the sky. Sometimes it covered the sun, sometimes they let the sun shine through, lighting up the shade and warming the breeze.

Audrey supposed that the Bard was right; moments like these were worth preserving. When it was calm and serene, it made it all worth living, all worth saving, all worth doing. But it couldn’t always be this way, could it? She didn't understand why the natural order could be broken just because someone had been so passionate. Moments didn’t last forever. Waves of sadness always found a way to crash into the mainland and drown the happiness and sometimes it was incredibly hard to revive said happiness. 

The poor bard probably got depressed every now and again, though he seemed happy-go-lucky most of the time. Audrey never understood how someone could be that lucky to receive the gift of joy, though she figured it had its drawbacks as well. However, someone as dismal as the witch was on their team, and she had such a negative output on the world that Audrey didn’t expect her to even try to be a hero.

She didn’t expect them to become heroes. 

Audrey was proven wrong. At first, the thought left a sinking feeling in her stomach, but the more she thought, the more she felt lighter and more at ease. She laid back down in the grass under the shadow of the tree. Her hand hovered over the soft grass, sometimes petting a clover or daisy hidden somewhere in the tall blades. It didn’t matter now. What was done was done, and she couldn’t take it back no matter how much she wanted to. Her face fell.

She tensed up when she felt the familiar coolness of metal on her fingertips (when had she lost her gloves?) and the familiar sting of magic stimulated on it's blade.

She coaxed herself into sitting up after a while to glance at the weapon lying useless on the ground beside her. The sunlight that shone through the leaves of the tree captured the sword in rutilant light, the reflection of lightning leaving a familiar feeling installed in her stomach. Audrey knew this was the crave for power inside her and the sword was calling out to it, crying desperately to be used, to be held, to kill.

The crave of power was washed away in the sea of disgust and sickness that washed over Audrey.

It never felt right; the sword in her hands, the feel of cool metal through fabriced gloves, the burst of lightning at an opposer. At her target. At those two-

No. The sword she had carefully picked up in the midst of her thoughts was now carelessly slung on the ground. Audrey looked at it, disgusted, before turning away altogether.

She was a hero that killed. Eya, how had she not thought about that sooner? It seemed like such a wrong thought. A hero, one who was supposed to spare those in need, one that was supposed to care for all, killing. The thought was ludicrous!

Her spirits sunk further. What was worse was that it all turned out to be okay in the end. But it hadn't been okay. She killed all the overseers. She brushed people off. She hurt someone innocent.

She growled in annoyance. She was so stupid! All this time she thought of herself as a hero, but what was she really? She had killed multiple creatures, but what for? What did she progress? What did she really help?

A familiar sound started behind her, startling her out of her thoughts. The sun was kissing the horizon now, Eya, how long had she been in her never-ending cycle of thought? To her dismay, the sword was still beside her where she slung it, forgotten in the meadow and summer breeze.

Lighting bugs flashed their appearance, just as crickets made themselves known by their sound and night made itself known by pushing the sun past the horizon and letting the moon rise. Even then, Audrey never acknowledged the noise. It was a noise that she knew well but wished to never hear again. She didn’t hate the noise. No, it was rather comforting. Audrey would just rather save herself the embarrassment. 

Finally, after a few cool night hours passed and Audrey realized that the noise wasn’t going to leave anytime soon, she sighed and tucked the hair that was in her face behind her ear. The breeze only blew it back to where it was and Audrey muttered incoherently in defeat.

“What do you want, Eyala?” Audrey jumped at her own hoarse voice before settling again, hunched over on her knees. It was silent for a while; Audrey was starting to second guess the noise she had heard for hours as just a trick of the wind. However, Eyala finally spoke up, sinking down from the branches of the tree. Audrey assumed she had been seated there for a while, judging by how long she had to wait for Audrey to acknowledge her. 

“I wanted to make sure you were okay.” Eyala shrugged nonchalantly, but her voice was small and quiet. Audrey’s eyes shifted over to the sword again, uninterested. Eyala’s light reflected off the cold metal and shine on the dark grass in front of them. Eyala followed her gaze. Her face softened and she moved closer to Audrey, only inches away. Audrey didn’t look annoyed, but she didn’t look happy either.

“It’s still yours y’know.” Audrey’s head shot up to look at her with a scowl. 

“I don’t want it.” Eyala flinched at Audrey’s quick and aggressive response. The air was suddenly thick and tense. Any movement or word could’ve broken it, though Audrey was sure she didn’t want to know what would happen if it snapped.

When it was too silent, Audrey gripped the handle of the blade and pulled it into the air, not unlike if she were to charge. She threw it at Eyala lightly, making sure that it wouldn’t hurt her in the slightest. Eyala still flinched, which made Audrey falter. Then Audrey exploded.

“Take it! I don’t want it! I don’t want to kill!” Audrey pointed an unperturbed finger at Eyala. Eyala grew more nervous as the shouts echoed off trees across the field and came back to them. Audrey hated the amount of hatred that was flying out of her voice. It wasn’t Eyala’s fault, it was hers. She had been the stupid one. She had grown obsessed with becoming the hero. She was the one who killed.

Yet she couldn’t seem to stop herself from letting her anguish out and inflicting it on another, and that only made her more frantic.

“Get rid of it! Burn it, throw it into the sea, return it to Eya, I don’t care! I don’t want this stupid sword anymore, and you can’t make me own it!” Audrey slumped down to her knees again, cradling them in her arms. She buried her face. Out of shame or anger, she didn’t know what. 

After a few minutes, Audrey squeezed her knees for a last hope for comfort and looked back up where Eyala was. She was gone. Eyala had left a while ago. Audrey sighed in what she assumed to be relief. At least she was gone.

Her eyes wandered down, and her stress came rushing back again. Eyala had left, but she didn’t take the sword.

Audrey screamed, before grasping the handle again and swinging it into the field before her. It disappeared in the darkness until it hit the ground. There, under the faint moonlight, she could barely see an indent in the grass where the sword had landed, but she couldn’t have cared less where it landed. She kicked harshly at the ground. Then, clenching her fists, she swiftly turned and punched the tree where the birds had once stood above her, checking to see if she was alright. The tree shook, and pain cracked through her hand.

She collapsed against the tree, hugging it tightly as she could. Her arms couldn’t fit halfway around it so it was hard to hug it tightly as she desired, but she buried her face in the rough bark anyway and pretended it to be anything better than an inanimate object. Punching it had definitely gifted her some busted knuckles, but it hurt more knowing that she had taken innocent lives as a hero only for it to be all for nothing. What kind of hero was she?

-

She woke up the next day deciding to try and find civilization so she could find food and water to survive the next few days. According to her current plans returning back to her hometown would take a while, and she would have a lone trek in order to get there. She also had a side quest of figuring out how long it had been since the end of the world, only so she knew how long she had been gone and if she had to lay low or not. She wasn’t sure she could face the people who she nearly doomed. 

She stood up, then stumbled, and fell to her knees. Her head swam with dizziness, and it took her supporting her entire body on the tree to be somewhat stable enough to stand which gave her an idea of how long she had gone without food or water. She eventually reached Langtree by pushing herself from tree to tree until she stumbled upon a village person who took her in and took care of her. They had told her all the information she wanted to know, including the events that had happened in the past three days since “the end of the world.” They had advised her to stay for a week or so until she got better, then to travel to wherever she needed to go.

During that amount of time, the bard came around to visit the village which made it incredibly hard for Audrey to avoid them. She ducked behind buildings, crawled on the ground, or even ran into other peoples homes to avoid the eyes and the judgement of her once rival. She kept it up for a while, probably longer than she should have. She knew the poor idiot would probably forgive her the moment they laid eyes on her; that wasn’t quite her style. She didn’t exactly deserve forgiveness. To that, Audrey was content, though the idea of having a friend gave her a bittersweet feeling when she hid from unjudging eyes. However, if she had to live her entire life never seeing him again, she supposed she would have been content with that too. 

Fate never had it her way.

Months passed in a long stretch, and Audrey found herself never wanting to leave Langtree. It was warm and comforting, sure, but there were two things that kept her tethered there. One, she wasn’t sure she could face her hometown’s disapproving eyes when she would tell them she failed. It made her shudder when she thought about what they could do to her for not following the orders of Eya justly. Her town was never strict upon Eya’s rules themselves, she knew it was an irrational fear, but she couldn’t bear to take a step forward towards her old home anyway. The thought terrified her. So she decided to settle in Langtree where the villagers were nice enough to build her a home and give her space. 

The other thing keeping her there was her sword.

It was a missing part of her. She hated the idea of it, but it was something she could never allow herself to forget. Cries of anguish, metal hitting the ground, the whispers of doubt, they never let her forget, especially when she slept. Cold lightning struck trees and houses while pitch black clouds swirled in chaos. Trees snapped in half, houses tore apart, things smashed together violently under the force of unrelenting wind. The ground shook and cracked open but there was nothing but darkness beneath the ground, and Audrey was trapped in it all, crying desperately for it to stop. The dead overseers loomed over her trembling body on the shattering ground, singing a song in a haunted choir that never left Audrey’s head. The tune was always there, always mocking, always taunting and jeering at her until she broke and shot up in bed, falling off in the process. The cold floor provided a source of reality that she could never find in her dreams, so she soaked it up as her last bit of cognitive function searched for a reason to claim what she saw was irrational and not real.

Audrey choked down a sob, but regretted it since the next one hit her harder. She dug her nails into her arms as she hugged her knees tightly to her chest. She didn’t care her back was hurting, she was hurting far more than that of physical pain. She pushed herself away from her bed with her feet until she was pressed firmly against the wall by her trembling legs. She wailed into her knees and didn’t stop when she felt tears bleed through her sleep pants and onto her legs. She reached beside her to grab a bird plush she had bought for this kind of thing and hugged it tightly, letting her knees relax. She knew this would happen. After all, this was her nightly routine.

It was so frustrating! She had one adventure, one choice, one chance to make a difference, and it was all thrown away because she was too blind to see how much she had been hurting those around her, how much she pushed around the two real heroes, how much justification would be needed for killing those of an overseer. This was her consequence, but even then in the dark she felt as if she wasn’t being tortured enough, wasn’t being taunted enough, wasn’t being killed inside enough.

Before she knew what she was doing, she was pulling on a cloak that she had ripped out of her closet, putting on some boots, then slamming the door open and sprinting through the cool night air of Langtree. She ran through the village and weaved through the trees of the forest only to stop at the field, her field. She ran first into the grass, searching, looking frantically for the indent. It took half an hour of frantic searching, but when she found it, she screeched in full rage. There was no rust on the blade of the sword. There was no wear and tear on it’s make. There were no dents, corruptions, chips, or dulling. Everything had stayed the way she had left it nearly three months ago, including the familiar buzz of electricity in the enchanted metal. 

-

In the morning, Audrey arose out of bed with the little amount of sleep she could barely catch without nightmares in her eyes. She walked tentatively over to her closet and opened the door. Her clothes were all there except for the cloak she had used in the night last night, which had been tossed carelessly onto the floor. She eyed her selection carefully before picking an outfit and glaring at the sword she revealed by doing so. It glimmered in the light, once again asking, begging to be played with like a children’s toy. Audrey knew better than to listen to it’s intoxicating demands. She snarled then slammed the door in the sword’s face, making it clear of what her demands were.

Audrey’s day was as normal as it could’ve been. She tended to a small flower and vegetable garden she had constructed at the back of her house to help calm her still rushing nerves, she wandered around the small markets of Langtree and waved to any acquaintances she had made during her living time in Langtree, then she retreated to the long expanse of the Langtree meadows where she had appeared. There was nothing else to do, nowhere else to go, which made Audrey restless at times, which is why she visited the fields. It calmed her, reminding her to take it easy and to never go in over her head. The last time she did she…

She knew one step too far in one direction and she’d reach the outskirts of Delphi which is where the witch lived, and one step in another direction was the outskirts of Langtree which is where the bard lived, so she never wandered too far from her new home in precaution. She had taken multiple trips to Delphi, but that was only when she knew the bard announced to the entire village that he’d be out of town for a while. Other than that, she never strayed from the center of Langtree, which is where she felt safest.

The fields were one of the safe places. She would lay down in the midst of the grass and wildflowers and stare up into the blue unknown above her. She watched coulda change shape and giggled when she could find funny shapes of them. On days where there were no coulda, she would lose herself in her thoughts and dreams about impossible futures that only served to satisfy her desires, though they never fully did. 

Sleep begged for her attention, but Audrey knew the consequences. How she so desperately wished she could sleep a full night again, to have colorful and wonderful dreams, to be happy, but her wishing never had enough power over her state of mind. Any half-lidded attempts her eyelids made to get any sort of rest was futile. Audrey heard the faint rumble of thunder when she tried and it never allowed her to sleep, so she kept herself awake, never succumbing to the sleep she so desperately wanted and needed. Instead of sleeping, she would only stare into the endless pool of blue above her and wander if the warm breeze and the sound of the trees dancing was what it felt like to sleep again.

Nothing much else happened at her new home. It was ridiculously boring to live life the way she chose herself to. Audrey appreciated the slow life however, so she kept to it instead of the adventurous and dangerous life she had once dreamed of as a small child. 

“Oh poor, naive, small Audrey. If only you knew you’d grow up to be a killer.” She’d tell herself when she got restless for adventure. If heroes killed, she was sure she never wanted to be one ever again.

Months passed again, quicker as Audrey got used to her routine. Calming day, terrifying night, endless blue, black clouds, dancing trees, snapped trees, the days got duller as nights slowly got more terrifying and demoralizing. The sword in her closet remained untouched, Audrey remained in the fields of Langtrees for majority of the day, and the bard never saw her. The cycle left her on autopilot most days. She learned to accept the nightmares and the sword that never stopped calling to her in her closet. She accepted that Eyala never attempted to talk to her again and she accepted that the witch and bard never cared enough to look for her. She accepted she’d be alone, that she’d never be truly happy for as long as she lived. After all, it’s what killers deserve, don’t they?

-

Audrey headed into the center of Langtree again, smiling and waving at the village people. Small children ran past her with a ball and she couldn’t help but laugh as they did. She loved kids.

She headed into the woods, though not in the direction she would normally go to in order to get to the fields. She was going to Delphi for a small while to get away from her daily routine. Another plus was that Delhi was a far bigger town than Langtree and thus made them a better variety of trading than that of Langtree. She wanted this break so badly, so she packed up for a small trip and started walking.

When the green trees of Langtree gave way to the orange of Delphi, Audrey sped up a little further until the town was in her sight. She was glad to see that they remained as lively and bustling as they had been when she was there last. One of those times being when she needed the overseer song-

No, she reminded herself. This trip was for her, not about her. She walked forward with a shaky foot, but found that each step was easier to take as she went on. She enjoyed shopping in the shops and meeting some of the people she hadn’t said a word to in a long while. Most of all, she enjoyed sitting on a bench and soaking up the cool winds of Delphi.

She could understand why the witch had been so attached to her home. It was a beautiful area from both the climate to the wildlife that engulfed the town. The atmosphere was cool and calm despite the small crowds of people that gathered in random spots throughout the town and a small group of people practicing on their instruments a bit further away as to not disturb anyone near. 

Audrey left by hopping on leaves to hopefully get the satisfying crunch they let out when under too much pressure. She giggled as she hopped from one to another.

Her giggle fit was cut off suddenly by mumbling in between her leave crunching. 

“Are you sure we can find her like this?”

“You wanted to find Audrey, didn’t you?” Audrey stuttered to a stop and snapped to attention at her name. Of course anyone could have the name “Audrey” but there was the big chance that they could’ve been talking about her, and that's what terrified her.

She cautiously inched forward to the voices, and the closer she got to what seemed to be a small clearing the louder the voices got.

“Ya, I want to at least know if she’s okay.”

“Well this spell should allow us to see what she sees in this pool. If she’s dead-“ the voice faltered, most likely to Dalt her to preserve the more caring voice’s feelings. Audrey winced at the small awkward pause.

“- then nothing should happen, though that’s unlikely to happen.” The second voice talked a bit quicker as to get to the point faster.

Audrey peered around a large rock that seemed to be a barrier between her and the voices. Plus she’s rather not be caught snooping around if it wasn’t any of her business. The two people were were situated in a small oasis looking place. There was a small pond of water in the middle of the clearing of luminescent trees. Since the part of the woods they were in was a bit darker, the light stuck out more. 

The two people surrounding the pool were facing away from Audrey but she knew who they were. She didn’t know if she wanted to laugh or cry upon seeing them or not. The latter became true as she pushed a sudden tear out of her face. No matter how much she would deny it on the outside, she absolutely thrilled to see both of them again in this proximity and not from a distance. Eya, she wished she had cared enough to remember her names.

“I really hope she’ll be ok.” The bard looked down into the pool. The witch didn’t look nearly as sentimental as the musician, but her face softened when she saw her friend’s face drawn up in distraught. 

“I’m sure she’s alright. She’s a really strong person…” Audrey would have believed her if her voice didn’t sound so forced. The bard seemed to fall for it since they leaned over to give the witch a side hug. She tensed at the sudden action, then relaxed. 

“Alright you sap, I gotta do the spell no. You have the hair right?” The bard reluctantly let go of the witch and too out a singed glove that Audrey recognized to be one of her own. Her gloves must have flew off her hands sometime during the end of the world. She didn’t know how the bard got it in their possession, but shrugged it off. She didn’t really didn’t deserve to know, did she?

The bard pulled a long hair from the inside of the glove out. Audrey could see their hand tremble slightly.

“What now?”

“Put it in the pool. I have to use magic so try not to make too much noise. I need to concentrate.”

The bard nodded and did as they were told, but not before reminding the witch that if she should need help that they were there for her. She shrugged sheepishly but agreed to ask for help should she need it. 

It was silent for a moment, then muttering filled the vacant air; although Audrey couldn’t understand more than half of what the witch was saying but she could make out the sound of her name every now and then in the midst of her gibberish.

The pool burst with ligh on the witch’s last syllable. It acted as a weird beacon with the light reaching the roof of the canopy they were covered by. Both the bard and witch had to look away for a moment to adjust their sight. The bard cheered in delight once he could look again and leaned over the pool and into the light. His face was inches from the water in a desperate attempt to see better. Then, as quickly as it came, the light flashed away and the bard’s face fell.

“That’s peculiar…” the witch said, moving a bit closer when she realized what happened.

“Does that mean she’s dead Miriam?” The bard sounded so broken, and Audrey watched Miriam (That was her name, Eya, that was what her name was, ok!) physically flinch.

“No, the spell worked, I just-“ Miriam seemed to juggle for the right words to say. “- don’t understand why it’s not working now? I don’t know! Maybe the dumb book Saphy gave me was wrong!” Miriam hit the ground.

Audrey couldn’t take it anymore. It hurt too much to see them try and fail to find her. She hadn’t known how much avoiding the bard actually hurt him. She didn’t necessarily understand why, but she decided it didn’t matter. She stepped out from behind her hiding rock.

“It’s gonna take a lot more then the end of the world to kill me, nerds.” Both persons jumped so high Audrey was convinced that levitation was an after effect of the spell Miriam had cast. They both turned to look at her with wide eyes.

Audrey had been convinced that Miriam had hated her so she had expected nothing less than anger at her appearance. However, Miriam looked more confused than anything, looking back down at the pool and inspecting it closely.

“What…?” Miriam muttered against the water.

Audrey, though convincing herself that the Bard would forgive her on sight, wasn’t expecting him to be happy at her appearance. She was right then; the bard didn’t seem to know how to respond. Audrey understood, seeing as she was the hero that killed. 

“I uh, ‘m sorry about… well… everything…” Eya, she was bad at this. She visibly cringed at herself. “I was walking past when I heard you and… I didn’t expect you to be looking for me.” Audrey mumbled the last part of her sentence, suddenly wishing that she had just let them be. 

The bard’s face softened.

“Makes sense.” Miriam muttered, still inspecting the pool closely. She was making it a large point that she refused to look directly at Audrey anymore. Audrey couldn’t blame her. Audrey was a hero that killed after all. 

“Where have you been?!” the bard screeched as they launched themselves at Audrey and into a tight hug. Audrey nearly teared up. The hug felt so warm and nice…

“I-I’ve been in Langtree.”

“But I’ve never-“ 

“I wa avoiding you.” Audrey admitted as they let go of her. “I didn’t really think you’d want to talk to me, much less see me alive and kicking.” Audrey glanced at Miriam not-so-subtly who had been listening closely as she continued to investigate the magic mystery. Audrey caught Miriam’s eye once to which Miriam froze and avoided eye contact. Miriam shrunk in on herself the slightest bit. It hurt, but Audrey deserved it. It was her fault the overseers were dead. It was her fault the world almost ended. It was her fault that both Miriam and Bard had gotten hurt. All she did was make things worse. 

“Why wouldn’t I want to see you?” the bard retorted, almost offended.He poised his pointer finger to point at her. “ A life is a life. I don’t care whos’ or whats’, I care about them all. A life is a life, no matter who owns it.” The bard moved closer pushing his finger toward her face. Audrey flinched back, even though they posed no threat. “That includes you.”

Well, Audrey wasn’t expecting that.

“I-“

“I thought I told you to use Garlic!” Miriam shot up, scrambling to get as far away from the pool as possible. The bard looked at he confused.

“I thought you said Gala, like the apple.”

“That’s not even lose to garlic!”

“I didn’t mean to! I- wait,” Miriam was curled up on the ground, panicking. “, what’s going on?”

“The spell, because of the change of ingredients,” Miriam shot a glare to the bard who shrunk in on themselves. “, summons the person of subject's worst nightmare!” Audrey’s blood ran cold. She felt the color drain from her face and her mood. She suddenly felt nauseous and 

“Well, Audrey is brave! Her nightmares can’t be all that bad, can they?” They both turned to Audrey and frowned by how absolutely petrified Audrey looked. Audrey shook her head and once she started she couldn't seem to stop.

The pool flickered on again which made Audrey loose her breath and Miriam take a defensive stance in front of the bard. The pool spat out black clouds that instantly swirl ded around Audrey who screamed. The clouds allowed little light in, so Audrey lost all sense of direction, backing up only to trip over something and fall on the ground. Eventually, flickers of light from lightning ran across the canvas of clouds all around her. Audrey shouted, but nothing happened. The wind we too loud in her ears to eve hear herself breathe, and no matter how hard she clamped her hands over her ears, ther noise wouldn’t stop or cease. Audrey sobbed, not bothering to attempt to hold it down like she once would have.

Her hair slapped her face as the wind pushing it in several directions, and some of it stuck to her face where her face was wet from tears. Audrey would brush it away only to clamp her hears again, like it helped anything. Some of her hair found its way into her mouth. Audrey gagged in between sobs and yanked the hair out, forcing one hand down on the ground to keep her steady. She cried out again, praying to every overseer and Eya herself that she could just escape, just run, just sleep, just be happy.

As she did, the dead overseers loomed over her, cackling and taunting her with their song. It was the same tune and melody that haunted her sleep every night and haunted her eyelids every time she wished desperately for sleep the next morning and it only made Audrey cry out more. This time her nightmare was real, and she couldn’t wake up from it. Because of that, Audrey only sobbed harder, pleading for whatever deity that might be listening to her to just help her out of this just this once, and then she would never ask for any hit girl ever again. In fact, she almost practically plead for death when listing all the things the deity could jut do for her.

Lightning crackled over the makeshift sky until it didn’t and it slowed down. Audrey was still babbling and pleading but the slowing of her surroundings and the light that lit up the clouds helped finally breath and take everything that had just happened in. 

“Audrey!” The noise Audrey had heard around six months ago was back. This time, Audrey acknowledged it immediately, babbling incoherently at it. When she saw Eyala floating above her, she nearly passed out from the overwhelming sense of relief that she felt in that moment. 

“I’m so sorry I’m late!” Eyala rambled on frantically. Eyala tensed, and the clouds spun bit faster. She fixed whatever happened and the world slowed again, though it looked like it took a lot of effort. Eyala was shaking, and that was all Audre needed to see that this safety couldn’t last forever. 

“I brought you your sword!” Audrey’s already broken resolve was shattered further. She trembled for a second, tensed, then “No! I don’t want it!” Her voice broke a she plead. “I don’t want to kill! I don't want it!I don’t want to be the hero that kills! Please just take it back!” Audrey clenched her fist and dug her nails into her palm. It helped her remember that she was still alive and holding on, but it also helped relieve some of the pain in her heart which is what she really wanted gone. 

“Audrey!” Eyala snapped, the safety bubble Eyala made flickering. “The sword is not you!” Audrey’s head snapped up to look at the glittering metal. Her trembling stilled for a few seconds before re-establishing itself but not nearly as hard as she once was.

“The sword doesn’t kill, Audrey. It does whatever you want it to do. You don’t have to kill, you can defend, but that is your choice. Nothing else can make that choice for you!” Eyala dropped the sword in front of Audrey.

She watched as Audrey picked slowly went up to pick up the sword, then shakily made her way up onto her feet. It took a considerable amount of time and Eyala wasn’t sure she could keep her safety bubble together for the amount of time it took to rehabilitate herself. However, she was able to let Audrey grab onto the sword of all her might, the with a small salut, Eyala wished Audrey luck then disappeared, letting the chaos ensue.

-

Audrey watched the chaos unfurling around her, sword firmly in her hand. She could feel the excitement of the magical electricity pump through her body when she squeezed the handle for some form of comfort. It felt relieving in some sort of way, to finally be able to hold it and have a choice of how to handle the situation. 

She brought her sword up and slice down through the air as a warning. 

“Does Audrey have her toy back?” The dead overseers taunted, circling close around her. She faltered, but pushed herself into a stance with the sword in front of her, only to defend if necessary. She didn’t respond, she only hardened her expression.

“Audrey must be feeling quite murderous today!” the overseers all mused to each other. Audrey gripped the handle of the sword harder, keeping her emotional front up.”Shoot us Audery! Show us how wrong we were and how right you were!” She didn’t dare move. Though her shaking knees were begging for her to anything but star, she stood her ground and sunk further into her stance.

“Aw, Audrey is playing the hero!” Lightning shot the ground frighteningly close to where Audrey stood, but she didn’t move an inch. 

“Why don’t you fight?” They all yelled, frustration settling in their voices. It was something that Audrey’s lip quirked up at, though it was a very unsure quirk. Audrey trembled in place, she was still petrified. “I will not kill. I will not kill. I will not kill.” ran through her mind on repeat like a mantra.

Lightning struck the ground even closer and she flinched, but she sunk back into position immediately, readjusting her grip on the handle of the sword and digging he feet in the ground. Audrey willed away her desire to flee. She would not kill. She would not kill. She would not kill.

“You monster.” Audrey’s head reeled. That was a new one. “It’s what you do. The overseers loomed closer, their distorted faces coming closer to Audrey’s nearly straight one. Audrey had to put all her willpower into keeping her facade up. 

“You find the nexus point.” Audrey’s knees were quivering. “You find the overseer’s song.” Lightning crackled in Audrey’s ear, thunderless. “You solve the puzzles.” Audrey’s grip on the sword turned her knuckles white. “You find the overseer.” Irritation bubbled up in Audrey’s head. “And you KILL them.” 

“You’re wrong!” Audrey yelled at them. She brought her sword up in a split second reaction to block a bolt of lighting about to strike her. “I don’t want to be the hero that kills any more!” Electricity met blade and suddenly the clouds were cone. Everything went quiet, and Audrey fell backwards into the pool of the oasis, which thoroughly soaked in water.

She scrambled out of the water, coughing and choking, and lugging her sword behind her, before collapsing in the grass of the clearing. 

Miriam and the bard were shocked. They leaned over the exhausted hero that was panting for air.

“Is that what you dream of?” the bard asked, concerned. Audrey snorted. 

“Every night.” Miriam ran a hand through her hair. 

“We saw everything. We were able to get the right ingredients for the original spell again, this time we used gARLIC.” Miriam shot a look to her best friend while they shrugged in apology. Her face softened when she saw Audrey looking at her. “You gonna be okay?” She asked solemnly. It was almost gentle enough to be caring. Audrey smiled anyway.

“Yeah, like I said, it’s gotta take a whole lot more than the end of the world to kill me off.” 

“Woah! Where’d you get that shield Audrey?” the bard asked. Audrey looked at them, confused.

“What?”

“The shield in your hand!”

Lo and behold, the sword that used to be there was now a shield. Audrey smiled sadly, but inside, she was the happiest she had been in a while.

“I chose not to be a hero that kills.”

**Author's Note:**

> This took a really long time to type :')
> 
> Also this is most possibly the best thing I've ever written???
> 
> Also poor Audrey lmao
> 
> Also I drew a picture for this fic,,, I can't pictures on AO3 so you can see it on the Wandersong Amino (StarStickerX) or on my Twitter. (@GHappeny) (Or my Instagram (StarStickerX)) I'm good at this posting thing I swear.


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